As I write, I’m in the kitchen listening to music. This reminds me of when Tiffany and I would be in the kitchen baking and she would be dancing to the music and playing with toys. Can you remember times like this with your children, watching them play, laugh, and share?
Do you sometimes wonder if, on the whole, they are happy enough?
At night, I would tuck Tiffany in bed and pray with her, then I would tell her, “I love you, and God loves you thisssss much!” and I would open my arms out like in the shape of a cross.
But did she feel secure enough?
Most moms struggle with this from time to time, wondering if we’re doing enough: Are we providing our children a good enough childhood? Are we good enough moms? The question is important because the answer matters so greatly. We don’t want to fail our children. We want them to be deeply convinced that they’re loved, to have the right kind and amount of self-esteem, and most of all, to love God and be like His Son Jesus.
But how can we know if the job we’re doing as parents is sufficient to produce these results? The issue becomes especially complicated with someone like me, who didn’t experience stability and security in my own childhood. I knew what kinds of things not to do, but I didn’t fully understand. Someone like this may live with the nagging fear that the things she’s doing might not be enough to give her kids what she never had.
Precious mom, let me share with you what God has taught me. We don’t have to live in this constant fear. Our life as mothers is meant to be so much more than endlessly trying to measure up to society’s expectations, our best friend’s abilities, or even our own standards. The only One we have to please is God, and He does not make it difficult to know whether or not we are pleasing Him.
*First, He sets some clear, specific guidelines in His Word about how we should treat our children and how to love them. That’s spelled out plainly in the Bible.
*Secondly, when we have the Holy Spirit in our hearts, we have God Himself and His wisdom available right inside of us. We can be certain that He’ll tell us when we’re doing something wrong.
God’s ultimate desire for us is that we be conformed to the image of His Son—in other words, that we act like Jesus. So He’ll tell us if anything we are doing or failing to do gets in the way of that so that we can repent of it and uproot it from our lives. God won’t leave us with some vague, undefined sense of guilt.
What that means for us as mothers is that since God is the only person we ultimately have to please, if He’s not telling us we’re doing something wrong, then we are good enough.
So the next time you wonder whether you’re being the kind of mom you should be, simply ask Him.
This year may we learn to rest in the fact that though we’re not perfect, we can be the kind of mom who pleases God. And ultimately, that kind of mom is good enough.